The 68th Grammy Awards ceremony took place earlier this month. Here’s what happened:
Kendrick Lamar and SZA’s Luther won Record of the Year in a shallow competition against The Subway by Chappell Roan, a neoliberal’s dream, and Manchild by Sabrina Carpenter, a song that is neither lyrically nor melodically compelling, instead catering to a weird version of femininity that appeals to men who live with their parents past thirty.
Billie Eilish’s Wildflower, safe and Instagram-friendly but overall unexciting compared to her early tracks, won Song of the Year; an honorable choice compared to Golden from Netflix’s profit-driven slop monstrosity K-Pop Demon Hunters or Doechii’s Anxiety, which does an excellent job of causing the emotion it’s named after, and is undoubtedly her worst song — especially disappointing after her well-deserved hit album Alligator Bites Never Heal.
Olivia Dean took the Best New Artist award home. Safe to say, it would have been a human rights violation if Sombr’d even LAID his fingers on that Grammy. In fact, the 5-pound gramophone statuette’s weight would likely bend his delicate, waiflike figure. A TikTok user says, “SOMBR BANNED FROM ALL GRAMMY EVENTS DUE TO HIM DRESSING UP SO UGLY THE AI MODERATION DETECTED GORE.”
Before Katseye performs at the Grammys again, their production team should at least try to make sure the girls’ looks and talent aren’t being used to talk about fried chicken and Teslas in their seemingly AI-generated “music.” Another TikToker comments, “it’s literally insane that katseye was anywhere near a grammy. they should be getting slimed at the kids choice awards”.
Paramore’s Hayley Williams deserved at least one of the four nominations she received. Instead, she lost Best Rock Performance to YUNGBLUD, a pop punk band widely known for being somewhat of an industry plant. Amyl and the Sniffers also put up a worthy competition for the spot, an Australian punk band that includes men but still manages to capture the same on-the-nose attitude as riot grrrl bands like Bikini Kill and Bratmobile.
Music is political. The most influential and, whether you like it or not, popular musicians are at the Grammys each year. The majority of the artists in attendance wore a “ICE OUT” pin, and many used their speeches to make a statement. Bad Bunny reminded us that the only thing more powerful than hate is love, which he carried into his Super Bowl Halftime Show performance. This received higher viewership than the actual game on Sunday, according to LA Mag.
If things were done right – if things were done our way… We’d have made just a few adjustments, maybe even favoring music based on quality instead of how many TikToks give it free advertisement.
Our Best Dance/Electronic Recording Nominations:
tonight (nate sib)
choke enough (Oklou)
Infohazard (Ninajirachi)
Live Forever (The Hellp)
Our Best Dance Pop Recording Nominations:
Fame is a Gun (Addison Rae)
DANCE… (Slayyyter)
Spring is Coming With A Strawberry In The Mouth (Caroline Polachek)
Stars (PinkPanthress)
Our Best Alternative Music Record Nominations:
Essex Honey (Blood Orange)
Happy Birthday (Finn Wolfhard)
Malcolm Todd (Malcolm Todd)
Welcome To My Blue Sky (Momma)
Our Best Remixed Recording Nominations:
All the Things She Said (Harrison)
CSIRAC – Effy Remix (Ninajirachi, Effy)
Mannequin Love – The Dare Remix (Justice, The Dare, The Flints)
Stateside (PinkPanthress, Zara Larsson)
